Oh I’m sorry; you wanted my astrological sign (Libra) and not my body weight (libra translates into pound)

¿Qué Paso?:

Just call me Brik: That’s right, people in my town call me Brik…why?...because some people have trouble pronouncing the “e” and turn it into a “k” instead (even though I explain to them that my name has no “k” they still say BRIK!!)

Inflation: Gas prices and bean prices have gone up quite a bit...looking ahead to next year, there will be a lot of problems associated with lack of food…and the bus fares have already increased to make-up for the increased gasoline cost

Please wipe your feet before entering: I have a cardboard door mat now, because my neighbors thought that I was getting my house too dirty…only problem is that cardboard isn’t very water resistant

Weather update: It’s STILL raining on and off…I returned to my site after being evacuated…only to find out that I had to evacuate a second time…I will be returning to my site soon?...I hope. However, when I was allowed to go home for a few days I discovered that my house had turned green (yep, the mold had taken over). However, my town is just fine.

Currently playing on my neighbor’s radio (on repeat): “Said I loved you, but I lied” …someone save me from this song…if it repeats one more time I am not responsible for what I might do... “said I disliked this song, and I’m not lying”

A “should we really be doing this?” moment: A bike lane is being built along the major highway I travel along (It feels just like my crazy biking days in Boulder, Colorado but the raccoons have been replaced with herds of cattle and the occasional horse). The funny thing is I seem to people one of the few people using the new bike lane…others still insist on riding in the middle of the road. So here I am “the gringa” riding in the bike lane, all excited, while others still are not sure what the lane is used for…but I know everyone will catch on soon. In the meantime, busses are still having to swerve wildly around bikers

The Great Wall of Brik: My landlady built me a wall because she thought I was exposing myself to too much sun while washing my plates and laundry. It was a very nice gesture…and unlike the Great Wall of China, my wall was built in 1 day by about 10 chavalos…I just hope it doesn’t fall down…but so far so good

Plant update: My cilantro plant is thriving…I cannot wait to make guacamole

The fresco kid: Jon, the local door to door fresco kid, came by my house a few days ago and was soaked to the bone…but he knew I would want my carrot and orange fresco…he braved the rain to come by my house to drop off my fresco…muy amable!

My internet boyfriend: I was introduced to a Nicaraguan guy who lives in the city, he is a friend of a friend, and he is very nice but he wanted to get my phone number…instead, I gave him my email address and now my inbox is overflowing with various emails from him. I explained to him that I check email only once a week…but he still sends 1 email everyday of the week…and in hindsight I am very glad that I didn’t give him my phone number!

This is the Piggy Box that some of my students created as part of their small business...they make various clay animals to sell to the locals.

So I bought a bike about 2 weeks ago and almost every part on the bike has been replaced or adjusted in some shape or form. However, people just love my bike…and I just now understand why. I had a Nicaraguan friend of mine pick out the bike for me in order to get a fairer price. I told them all I wanted was a bike that worked well (because I have to travel pretty far on this bike). They seemed to be overly concerned with what color bike I wanted, but I told them again and again that it could be any color as long as it rode well. Ok, now flash forward 2 weeks, and I realize that my friend simply picked out my bike based on the color. My bike is niquelado (nickel plated) and for some reason people associate quality and expensive with that color. I associate cheapness and sudden disaster with that color, but I’m a bit biased. Anyhoo, I now know that my bike was purchased purely based on its color scheme, because it has broken down a bastante (enough) amount of times. On a positive note, all bikes around here break down on a rather consistent basis, which makes bike repair shops ubiquitous and inexpensive. Now a short walk down memory lane…As a kid, I always wanted bike pegs. I remember begging my parents for the pegs, but I was denied my request due to safety concerns. But guess what mom and dad, I now have 4 bike pegs…2 on the front wheel and 2 more on the back! Oh yeah…safety concern, I think not, just pure fun!! Now I just have to find 2 willing chivalos who would like to go for a bike ride with the gringa (which should be easy) …I will also try to take a picture pre-wipeout (that will be a challenge). And finally, my brakes don’t work when they get wet, and it is hard to keep them dry when it’s raining out and I’m biking through a river…que bárbaro (how brutal/cruel)!

HOT, HOT, HOT!!! I was warned ahead of time that the chilies I purchased were hot, but as usual I didn’t listen and threw a small fist full into my soup. Next, I went to sip my soup and about 10 seconds later my eyes started to water profusely. I then did something I’ve only seen in the movies…I drank ketchup…and it actually worked! Dona Tina’s ketchup saved my mouth from the unsavory hot chili fire burning sensation. Of course, being rather stubborn I was not going to throw away the large super spicy soup batch I had just cooked. So, I went to the local bean lady to purchase some red beans, which I hoped would tame down the hot flavor. I arrived at the bean lady’s house to find out that bean prices have DOUBLED in less then a week. The bean price increase was also mentioned in the local paper. So I had to shell out twice as much to make up for my cooking disaster. When I got back home with my beans, I threw them into the soup pot and that did the trick! In the end I made “bean soup” that was quite tasty.

I was evacuated for 5 nights and 6 days because of the torrential amount of rain hitting Nicaragua. I had to leave my house ASAP and when I got back I found that mold had taken over. My allergies started acting up (my throat became a bit constricted) and then I broke out the cloro (bleach). Mold didn’t have a fighting chance against my spray bottle of bleach. I gave all the walls a good spritz and after a few hours my house smelled very fresh and was devoid of mold. Hurrah!

Thursday, I arrived at school to find out that my counterpart was also at school but didn’t want to teach class. So I went ahead without her and had a heart to heart conversation with the kids. I wanted their honest feedback about the class. I also wanted them to get to know me better and therefore I told them they could ask me questions. The feedback I received was as I had expected, they were bored and felt the class lacked energy and dinámicas (dynamics/games). I must say I agree, after seeing the teacher use her “copy the information I read out load” technique I was bored to death. The kids loved the fact that they could ask me questions and the first question I received was when is your birthday? Next, the kids started calling out the word: Libra. Let me explain, Libra in Spanish means “pound.” For example, una libra de pollo (1lb. of chicken). However, Libra is also an astrological sign, in fact it just happens to be my astrological sign. Therefore, I proceeded to give the class my body weight (in pounds). I was of course confused as to why they wanted to know my body weight but thought oh well, no harm! Well, they didn’t want to know my body weight, they were yelling out Libra because they wanted to see what male students I was astrologically compatible with…because if the stars are aligned just right they think they might have a shot at a date. YEAH RIGHT.

I did it, I bought fish from the local fish vendor. I figure the ocean is close enough that the fish is fresh. Really, I am just praying that the fish is fresh because it was not on any ice when I bought it. However, I cooked it up several days ago and my health is just fine (no bad side-effects …yet). Next, I plan to buy shrimp or shark.

Next week, I will be at a Spanish Taller (a Spanish workshop) and then that following weekend I will be a chaperone at Prom! The school year is quickly winding down, and I hope to keep everyone motivated enough to teach 1 more lesson. Then comes vacation time for all the students and teachers…during this time I plan to start working on some side projects (like a small reading group). I have also been invited to tons of fiestas, which I am excited to attend.

Wonder Woman has flown into my town and brought along her two crime fighting buddies: Golden Goddess and Captain Underpants

¿Qué Paso?:

Weather update: It’s STILL raining…and I have been EVACUTATED due to a tropical storm that is coming through the area. So, I packed a small bag with some clothes, grabbed my rain boots, and threw on my rain jacket, which is molding due to all the rain…oh sweet irony.

Cleaning house: My host mom offered to mop my floor for me because I am not doing a good enough job!! Ok, I clean but I certainly don’t mop 3 times a day (which is customary). I mop once every 3 day, which quite frankly I think is enough!

Interesting stuff that has been said to me: “Are you from Costa Rica?” (which makes me think my Spanish is getting really good…not!) and “You have nice legs” (this was said to me in English by one of my students. He was trying to practice his English with me, and this was the one phrase in English that he had been taught).

Latest infestation: As if having a bat and mouse problem isn’t enough…I am now having a cockroach problem as well!

Strike a pose: If one of my students owns a camera or a camera phone…I am likely to be in their photo archive. Why, because students like to take pictures of me…yes, just me…I try to invite others into the photos…but I am usually unsuccessful. So there I am standing (alone) smiling as students go crazy snapping multiple shots. Uncomfortable situation…oh yah…but I just keep on smiling. Don’t worry, I’m not letting the fame get to my head. But in the meantime, would someone get the paparazzi off of me?

Whoops: I went to the market to buy oranges and was asked, “Do you want these oranges for fresco?” I said “yes” because I just wanted the oranges ASAP. Well, that was a mistake. It turns out fresco oranges are not sweet…they are very bitter. So I bought 8 bitter oranges that were not edible. And I ate them anyway, but next time I will specify that I want “dulce” (sweet) oranges.

Transportation update: I bought a bike, went for a cruise around town, 3 hours later I had a flat tire, got it fixed, next day went for another ride even further away from town, the bike gears broke, I flipped the bike over to fix the gears, got grease all over me, it started to rain, I walked through a mud river to get back into town, I got the gears totally replaced. Did I mention that I bought this bike new? Yep, the guy told me it was “brand new.”

A “should we really be doing this?” moment: Cruising down the highway in a microbus is always a little bit dangerous…then add rain and total darkness and the adrenaline really starts pumping. I can usually handle the micro, but two days ago I hopped on board a micro (at night while it was raining) and the driver decided to go into reverse on a major highway right near a blind corner. Why would the driver pull a move like this? To pick up an extra passenger, obviously. No worries, I am still alive.

This is the cake and present table for the pinata party I attended. The cake is made with corn flour, which makes for an interesting tasting goodie!

I just got back from an interesting/bizarre cultural event which is called an “Acto.” It takes place at the school, and class is canceled to make room for the “acto.” To prepare for the event, there is a stage and backdrop set-up on the basketball court. There are 2 giant speakers on each side of the stage and around 200 students stand in single file lines near the front of the stage. Actos can last anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours! The acto begins with the national anthem and is followed by various presentations from students and teachers alike. I will describe Thursday’s acto only: I arrived at my school right on time, only to find out that I had walked through the pouring rain for nothing, because class was canceled and replaced with an acto. There were 5 students on the stage, 3 dressed as Native Americans, 1 dressed in a suit (who apparently represented the country of Spain) and 1 girl dressed as Wonder Woman. No kidding, she wore a cape, a shiny tiara, magic wrist protectors, a corset, and a really short skirt/underwear (apparently ready to fight evildoers at a moments call). The Native Americans wore feathers in their hair, and their shirtless bodies were painted with “Native American” symbols aka random lines and circles drawn all over their bodies (most likely in permanent marker because after the acto was finished I witnessed the boys hopelessly scrubbing their bodies off to no avail, which leads me to believe that they used permanent marker instead of washable marker!). Anyway, the girl dressed as Wonder Woman was suppose to represent the Queen of Spain (I had to ask a student to explain to me who the girl symbolized…it was apparently a stupid question because the student thought it was rather obvious). Next, and this part of the acto literally caught me off guard, the stereo speakers started booming filling the courtyard with the sounds of drums and tambourines…and then came the procession (man, I wish I had my camera on me…but unfortunately I had left it at my house). A girl wearing a gold bra entered, just like Madonna…and not the “Madonna” who mothered Jesus…the other Madonna who rocked-out hard during the 80’s era. The girl had gold glitter covering her nearly naked body, and a long gold skirt with slits all the way up, topped off with a gold headdress. Now keep in mind this girl is 15 years old, she is standing in front of all of her classmates and teachers…nearly naked and very gold. Need less to say, this outfit beat out the girl dressed as Wonder Woman. But this is the least of it, because directly behind the “Golden Goddess” was a boy wearing an adult diaper holding a stick with feathers tied to the end. The students marched all around the court and finally ascended the stage to give an explanation of what their costumes represented. I guessed that golden girl represented the 80’s decade and I thought that diaper boy represented adults who have urinary track problems …however, I was wrong). The girl was supposed to represent the sun goddess and the boy was supposed to represent a Native American! Finally, as this whole scene was unraveling, the rain was pouring all around the students! This was unfortunate for the student clad in the adult diaper; because, the lining in the diaper started to expand as it got wetter and wetter from the rain! Thank goodness the scene was short, because the students walked off the stage after a 5 minute dialogue (all except for diaper boy who had to waddle off stage because his drawers had soaked up so much water). That was my day, and I can hardly believe it happened. Finally, to top it off, the day the students were celebrating is called Dia de la Hispanidad (very similar to Columbus Day). However, the students were celebrating it on the wrong day…it was the 11^th of October and Dia de la Hispanidad is officially on the 12^th of October. Therefore, they canceled my class to celebrate a holiday 1 day early…argh!

Hit that pinata with all your might!! This is the birthday girl...who turned 5!

A teacher that I do not work with walked up to me and introduced themselves, however after giving me their name, they failed to include what subject they taught. We were talking and they asked my opinion on English grammar compared to Spanish grammar. The teacher asked me, “Do you think that the grammar is similar or different.” I responded, that I thought the two were different. For some reason this turned into a rather heated conversation and the teacher tried to convince me that that grammar was in fact identical. Well, unbeknownst to me, I was talking with the English teacher, who has been teaching English for 23 years, and adamantly believes that there is no difference between English and Spanish grammar “they are identical.” I tried to salvage the conversation by asking if the teacher would like to practice their English skills with me, but she didn’t feel comfortable talking with me in English!! Yikes, I think I insulted her but it was unintentional. Lesson learned; always ask the question “what is your occupation” before starting any kind of debate.

A very popular trend in the Nicaraguan classrooms is to use whiteout on all errors made on paper (even if it is not an assignment the students are going to turn into the teacher, they still use whiteout to fix their mistakes). Now a simple solution would be to use pencils instead of pens, but everyone seems to prefer pens over pencils. Early on in their lives, students are trained to use whiteout on their mistakes at a young age and therefore this trend extends into adulthood. This leads me to my story. I went over to my counterpart’s house to get a list of 10 names. I simply needed 10 student names…nothing complicated…I thought the visit should only take 5 minutes at most…right? Oh how wrong I was, 2 hours later I finally walked out of her houses with the names. What happened? Whiteout happened! Basically the problem was that each student had 5 names (lets do the math: 5 x 10 = 50 names…and don’t forget there are some tricky spellings). The teacher would start writing a name, and then inevitably make a minor spelling mistake. She would immediately reach for the whiteout to correct her error, however; if there were too many whiteout mistakes she would throwaway that paper and start anew. This paper was not going to be turned into anyone; I was simply going to transcribe the names into an email, and the teacher new this as well. Yet, it still took 2 hours to get the 10 names, which were printed perfectly (with only 1 whiteout mistake). Lesson learned, leave lots of time for whiteout!

Alright, this is another example of class being needlessly canceled. I traveled 2 hours out with a backpack stuffed full of teaching materials. I arrived at the school, and I was told that class was canceled because the usual classroom was being occupied by a guest lecturer. I proceeded to glace around the school, and I noticed 5 totally empty classrooms. I asked why I couldn’t give class in one of the empty rooms…well, to my astonishment I couldn’t…and therefore the class commenced outside in the courtyard, where we were surrounded by noisy kids playing kickball, volleyball and just throwing stuff randomly. It was a tough class to get through, especially when I was approached by Mr. Hip-hop. This 18 year old male student approached me in the middle of my class, while the students were working together in their groups. He was not in my class but he is a current 5^th year student at the school. He said that he just want to introduce himself…yeah right! Here’s the scene, I am sitting underneath a tree, and he struts up with his cell phone carefully concealed in his front shirt pocket playing a really inappropriate 30 second hip-hop song clip (with lyrics like “I see you grinding up on the dance floor”). After he asked me 2 “opening” questions (what’s my name and where am I from) he got to the point, and asked me if I had a boyfriend and if I would like to get a soda. Thank goodness I have a made-up boyfriend, who is just fabulous, and saved me again from making an awkward situation even more unbearable. Oh yes, as we were talking he continued to push the replay button on his phone so that the 30 second sound clip would replay over and over again. Anyway, I told him “si, yo tengo un novio” (I have a boyfriend)…and all of a sudden he said, “ok, but where does he live, and are you going to bring him to the December festival?” I was not prepared for these questions, this guy was crafty, and so I said that my “boyfriend lives far away and that he would not be coming to the December festival.” This was all that the boy wanted to hear, he smiled and said “good” and proceeded to switch off the inappropriate rap song and walk away…calling “adios.” Yikes! What have I done? I think I just added fuel to the fire!

The candy went flying every which way and the kids got down and dirty...

I attended a piñata party last weekend, which was planned out perfectly. In fact, I have noticed a trend in Nicaragua, and that is that all of the piñata parties I have attended have been executed with amazing efficiency. Here is what goes on during a piñata: First, guests arrive at the party and drop off a birthday present. Next, the seats are pre-arranged around the piñata and kids are organized into groups. The kids strike at the piñata, meanwhile food is being served to all the seated guests. Eventually, the piñata bursts open and candy goes flying everywhere (watch out because the kids will kill for candy). Finally, the birthday song is sung, and the cake is cut and passed out to the guests. Now, the party is officially over and everyone leaves. The gifts are opened later. That’s it!! The kids are well dressed and well behaved…it is unlike any kid-party I have ever attended…because it’s actually fun, and it’s all about the timing!

Chicken, it’s what’s for dinner…and the constant threat of salmonella poisoning

¿Qué Paso?:

Weather update: Octubre is the rainy month. What does this mean for me? Well, my clothes are in a constant state of molding and my chances of contracting an unknown foot disease from stepping in puddles has just increased 10 fold!

My radio is currently tuned to: Daddy Yankee, my students just can’t get enough of this guy! They just love his music and therefore I must learn to love his music too.

Interesting things that have happened on the bus: People like to touch my hair…I feel like a doll or dog because they will pet my head! Oh well!

Interesting question I’ve been asked: “Is your mom as pale as you are? Your family must go through a lot of sunscreen.”

An observation I’ve made: People here pump gas and don’t bother to turn off their car while gas is flowing into their vehicle. Dangerous?…perhaps. On the plus side, it is a speedier exit from the gas station (no timely hassling with the ignition turning the car on and off). However, isn’t there a possibility the car could blow up?

Recent purchase: I bought raw chicken in the market (from the meat seller) and noticed that they also were selling big cloves of garlic. So I also asked the vendor to include a few cloves of garlic, which he proceeded to throw into the same bag as my uncooked, very raw, chicken meat. My reaction: “OH NO…cross contamination….not salmonella poisoning!!” The idea of cross contamination is non-existent in Nicaragua. But being an American germo-phobe I freaked! I decided to save the garlic by throwing it into a soup (I don’t waste ANYTHING)…I just boiled away the salmonella poising!

Close, but no cigar: I almost bought “street shrimp,” which raw shrimp sold door to door. But I had a last minute change of mind, as I considered the high probability that the shrimp has not been refrigerated for at least 5 hours…while the vendor is walking the shrimp through the streets with the sweltering sun beating down on the scrumptious crustaceans. I suppose I have avoided a minor case of food poisoning but I have to ask myself was it worth it?

Recipe update: I will be posting a new recipe in 2 weeks, as my cooking class was canceled this past week and was rescheduled for 15 Octubre.

The machismo is starting to wear on me a bit. It gets to be a bit annoying when every time I walk out of my house I am hissed at or catcalled. I try to avoid large groups of men sitting together on street corners, but sometimes this is impossible and I must walk on by the group. I try to ignore most of it but here is a recap of what usually happens when I put on my “I cannot hear you” face:

1) First I hear the “hiss” (which I proceed to ignore…and I continue walking)

2) Next a clicking sound emits from their mouths (I still don’t pay any attention)

3) Of course, the men must yell out something obscene at me in Spanish

4) If they still don’t get my attention, they resort to yelling out something obscene in English

5) Still no reaction from me…then sometimes they finally resort to talking to me face to face…using actual words and sentences!!! Amazing how using sentences instead of clicking and hissing at someone can initiate an actual conversation!

Yesterday, I had a visitor. It was the wife of one of my counterparts and she was hand delivering a note that was addressed to me, which was written by her husband, my counterpart. First of all, my counterpart lives 1 block from my house. Secondly, my counterpart also has my telephone number. Thirdly, I had a meeting with my counterpart the previous night. This being said, he sent his wife (on a bike) to deliver a handwritten note! The note read as follows (no translating needed, because he wrote it to me in English):

Hi Brie, I hope you are right I need that you are the teacher today I know you can, Today I’m gonna go to Leon and I want you bring an activity and develop it with student as a class. I need that you know much more to the students, and today is your day. I own you a present.

Teaching alone doesn’t scare me, actually I quite enjoy it, but I am here to work with the teachers. Luckily, I had already prepared for the class and I proceeded to give the students a mini-test in order to better assess their skills. I gave some simple directions at the beginning of class:

1) No talking to your friends

2) No cheating, eyes on your own paper

3) No calculators allowed

4) If you don’t understand a question just skip it

5) This is not a graded test and you have as much time to complete it as you need

Here is a brief sampling of the questions I asked on this test/questionnaire:

1) How old are you?

2) Do you have a job? If so, what do you do?

3) What do you like to do during your free time?

4) What does the word “business” mean to you?

5) What is 20% of 18?

6) What are your expectations for the coming year?

This test consisted of a mix of “get to know you questions” and a few basic questions about the subject of business. The result of this test session was rampant cheating!! Yes, even for the questions like “how old are you” and “do you have a job” the students had to look off of one another’s papers. One student didn’t answer those questions at all, and when I approached him about it he said he was going to answer later (which he eventually did, after looking off another student’s paper). No one in the class got the percentage question correct, because they all copied 1 student’s answer, which happened to be incorrect (20% of 18=1.11??). I do not want to insult the class’s abilities or intelligence, because I believe they are all capable and clever. It’s the culture of collective cheating that has to be stopped! Thank goodness they didn’t copy the same “name” or “age” on every paper!! Never the less, the outcome of the test was positive overall; I can now see how many responsibilities these kids have outside of class. Since this school is rather rural, all the students live on a farm. Therefore, they all have farm work, which can be tiring and occupy a lot of time. I also learned that most of my students range from 15 to 22; however, they are all in the same grade and the same class. To finish off the class, and leave the students in a good mood, we played a game. In fact, they loved the game so much that instead of going out to recess they stayed in the class to play a few more rounds. Overall, the questionnaire accomplished 2 objectives, I now know my students skills and their personal interests.

For my birthday, I received a lot of food gifts from my community, which I thoroughly enjoyed. I cannot say it enough, Nicaraguans are very generous people! However, the strangest food gift I received happened to still be alive. Yikes!! I went over to a counterpart’s home to chat and they told me they had a gift (regalo) for me. They asked my permission to go get the gift, and of course I said “sure.” They were gone for about 10 minutes in the backyard (I later realized they were attempting to “catch” my gift during this time period). Of course, my curiosity grew as the time elapsed and finally they came back with a LIVE chicken!! Instantaneously, my mouth drop opened and my eyes widened. My counterpart said, “Brie, I remember you told me that you liked chicken soup, you know I have a very good memory when it comes to these things.” True, I did tell all of my counterparts I liked chicken soup (I also said I liked beef and pig soup…and I just hope no one gives me a live cow or pig). My counterpart preceded to hand me the chicken, smiling proudly, I still stood in front of him with my mouth agape and thinking to myself: what I’m I going to do with this poor chicken? My counter partner then asked me, “You do know how to kill it, right?” I came back with a resounding, “No!?” And he said, “It’s easy, just have your neighbor help you!” So I walked home with the chicken bundled in my arms, and on the way home I was stopped by every person I walked past because they were all curious: Did the gringa buy this chicken? Is she going to eat the chicken? Does she know what a chicken is? I was graciously informed where to buy feed, how much to feed the chicken and most importantly I was told that if I didn’t tie my chicken up it would run away (which secretly I hoped it would do…save your own life chicken…run free into the wild). For a moment, I thought I would “Set my chicken free,” but then I changed my mind. I haven’t eaten chicken in over a month…and I do enjoy chicken…savory and tender…my mouth is watering now as I type this description. So, this Saturday I am having my neighbor kill my chicken and make chicken soup for everyone. I did consider keeping the poor chicken as a pet but I was then informed that 1) the dog at my house would eat the chicken and 2) This type of chicken is really rico (tasty). Therefore I can only say one thing, Buen provecho!

This is a picture of my chicken (before she was turned into soup). Don´t worry I don´t have an after picture!

Quick chicken update, I was just informed that my chicken is a little too small to eat and therefore I must go to the “chicken exchange” to swap her for a bigger bird. Also, I had a minor misunderstanding with one of my neighbors this afternoon. I thought they were asking me “what I like to eat”…and I responded, “chicken.” They adamantly refused this answer and shook their heads “no,” which left me awkwardly gawking and repeating, “what’s the problem with chicken?” Well, it turns out they were really asking me “what does your chicken like to eat.” The proper response to this question would have been rice or corn…imagine their astonishment when I told them I feed my chicken, chicken…Que horrible!

The “Brie Exhibit” will be showing for the next 2 years

Bienvenido a San Juan Del Sur: For my birthday I spent a wonderful day at the beach. Clear blue water, sunny skies and a peaceful atmosphere (what more can a birthday girl ask for?)¿Qué Paso?:

My radio is currently tuned to: Radio Romantico, this station consists of classic American tunes dubbed in Spanish…it always puts a smile on my face to hear “Take My Breath Away” sung in Spanish!

Sign Sighting: Crammed in the back of a routa (local bus) I was able to catch a glimpse of the following shop sign, which read: ¨We Make Shoes, Tacos, and Orthopedic Shoe Inserts.¨ Where else can you eat a fresh taco while having shoes and orthopedic-wear made?

Regalos (gifts) that I have received this week: Squash, pig meat, gallo pinto, and shredded chicken

Interesting question I’ve been asked: Why don’t I have more names? (apparently a first, last and middle name are not enough…most people here have 5 official names and countless nicknames)

Minor Misunderstanding: Someone asked me, “Quire un carmelo (would you like a candy)” To my dismay, the candy in question was really a medicinal cough drop. So apparently, cough drops are also considered candy…I learn something new everyday!

Recent purchase: A plant cleverly called “Sandía (watermelon),” because the leaves look like the rind of a watermelon. I purchased the plant in Estelí, at a little restaurant called La Casita, which I highly recommend to anyone looking for fresh and healthy food. They serve wheat bread, Swiss cheese, brie cheese, tea, coffee, homemade yogurt and homemade granola. They also sell a variety of plants and seeds. My meal cost 30 cords (or $1.66) and my potted plant also cost 30 cords, what a deal!

The sunset at San Juan Del Sur

News flash, I just had a birthday and I am now 23…man, do I feel old. The good news about growing older in Nicaragua is that I am still considered a “youth.” In fact, I will be considered a “youth” up till age 30 or 33ish. My birthday was a lot of fun; I went to teach at my local school and was serenaded with the most bizarre (but wonderful) birthday song I’ve ever heard. The song included lots of clapping, a fast tempo and then a slower tempo, some yelling and then some singing, and to boot it lasted around 7 minutes. Good thing I didn’t have a cake with candles burning, because the candles would have burnt out long before I had a chance to blow them out (7 minutes later). During the song, I was seated in the middle of the room (not by choice, this was where the students placed me). It was a bit uncomfortable to sit in a chair and smile around the room for what seemed like a ridiculously long time, but the song was a wonderful gesture. I ended my day with a dinner of rice and shredded chicken, altogether it was a happy day!

I have recently been hassled by a 20 year old chavalo, whom I will call “Juan Doe”…don’t worry this is not his real name…I am trying to protect his identity. He drives a bus route up North and wants me to come visit him (he’ll even drive me on the big yellow bus for free). He has offered to take me to dinner, to the movies, and to las fiestas. Need less to say, I am not interested. I try to convey this feeling as kindly as possible but it is difficult when the guy is following me everywhere around town on his bicycle. I went into the internet café for 1 hour, and the guy waited outside until I was done. Then he biked (in slow motion) right next to me as I was walking home. In fact, I was surprised that the bike didn’t just tip over, because of the slow pace, but he managed to keep his balance (simply amazing). So, Juan Doe also wants to buy me a cell phone in hopes that he can reach me exclusively. I don’t want to lead this guy on, and I don’t believe I am, because I continue to turn down all of his offers/gestures. But when will he leave me alone?! Obviously, “no” is just not quite getting through to him, and that’s when a brilliant idea popped into my head. Feign ignorance, and tell him that in fact I am married and when he originally asked the question “Usted tiene un novio (do you have a boyfriend),” I misinterpreted it as meaning do I own a “novillo (a young bull),” which obviously I do not, and therefore would answer a definitive “no” to this question. Then I can add, “Oh, but I do have a novio, whoops, I’m still learning Spanish…sorry for the mix-up.” My problem will be solved! “No, I don’t own a young bull but, oh ya, I just remembered I have a boyfriend!”

Central Cathedral in Rivas

I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned this already in a previous blog, but it’s hot here! After reiterating the obvious, let me get to my point, I have had this occur several times on bus trips, and it absolutely horrifies me: I board a bus, chances are I am taking a minimum 1 hour ride, and strangely the windows of the bus are all rolled up. WHY, WHY, WHY? It’s hot, there is no need to ever roll up the windows, unless rain is pouring in through them, and even then it better be raining really hard to warrant a “window roll-up.” However, I have been on several very unfortunate bus rides where the windows remain rolled up for the entire ride. The reason behind this logic: Women don’t want their hair to be messed up by the wind. My counter-argument: Dripping sweat, to the point where it appears that a person has just stepped out of a pool or a shower, is just gross. It is preferable to have a bad hair day verses a smelly sweaty day. However, this logic clearly does not carry through to others on the bus, because they proceed to roll their windows up. I also feel that heat exhaustion is a likely side effect, due to the lack of free flowing air through the bus. I have yet to find a solution to this conundrum. Yes, I have asked the conductor if I can roll down my individual window…and the answer is NO (because the women around me protest). So this is my next idea: maybe I will have someone ship me my authentic “Sea World handheld fan that shoots out water from the mouth of Shamu the whale.” Perfect, I’ll see how this approach goes over with the people sitting around me…I feel they will finally see the light and allow me to open the window rather than get splashed with whale water mist from my fan.

Whenever I meet a new person, which is every single day, the first few questions they always ask are: are you married, do you have kids, how old are you, and what are you doing here???? I always answer truthfully, however I have been contemplating spicing up my life a little and making a few things up (namely, creating a spouse (Harry) and kids (Hermione and Ron). What, I just got finished reading the final Harry Potter (thanks mom for shipping that out) and those are the names that happen to be on my mind…hopefully no one with notice, maybe I should me more conspicuous? Anyway, the truth has gotten me absolutely nowhere, because once I say the magic words “I’m single,” people start trying to fix me up with their hermano, tio, amigo, cousin, second cousin, …. Basically, they feel sorry for me, and think that I should be dating one of their relatives immediately to alleviate my loneliness. I always try to politely refuse these numerous offers, but it is just an awkward situation. Therefore, I am going to invent a family. My husband, Harry, lives in the United States. He is about 6’ 4” and plays football; he will be visiting me very soon and is also the jealous type (this addition will help to prevent the local guys from hassling me). It’s that simple, all that I need is a ring, which I will purchase for 20 cords at a local market! I haven’t put this plan into action, yet, but I am very tempted!

The U.S. might have Pizza Hut but in Nicaragua we have the Pizza Hot!

The front part of my house serves as my living room, kitchen, dinning room, and occasionally my nap area (thanks to the addition of a hamaca). It is a multipurpose area, and often I open up my front door and windows to let the air flow through the house. However, lately as I’ve gotten to know more of the neighborhood chavalos I have found that opening up my door and windows inadvertently creates the “Brie Exhibit.” Come marvel at the gringa, she cooks, cleans, studies, reads…a very rare species indeed! The children gather outside of my door (usually a group of 5 to 6) and they just stare. Of course, I approach them and ask them questions (how are you, what’s new etc. etc.) but after a while they would rather watch me in my natural domestic habitat. Maybe to entertain the kids I should start making some fun animal noises in my “cage” (but this wouldn’t bode well for the “American” image…so maybe I will resist).

Yesterday, a young girl (age 9) asked what I was going to do with the small bolsa (bag) of huevos (eggs) I had just purchased. I responded “I am going to eat them.” Her face lit up and she said, “Really, when do you eat eggs?” I told her I eat them for breakfast, lunch and dinner! Then she asked what other Nicaraguan foods I liked (when I responded that I like everything, I realized this answer was just not sufficient. She wanted the exact names of comidas (foods)…so I started naming off everything…pollo, huevos, gallo pinto (the mention of this typical dish always elicits a laugh from whomever I’m talking with…still no clue why), sopa de cerdo, sopa de pollo, nacatamal….and the list goes on!

Apparently, there is a big fiesta in December (go figure) and my dance card is already full. My teachers have already planned for me to visit their rural towns and participate in the fiestas. They have proceeded to show me pictures of last year’s festival and the festival from 3 years prior (the both looked the same to me). They are also prepping me for the festival by telling me all the things that go on during the month of December. The excitement exudes from their faces, and it’s rubbing off on me too…now I just have to wait a few months! However, Deciembre will be here before I know it!

Another recipe…the corn tortilla is extremely popular and sells for 1 cord/tortilla in the market place and all around town.

Dish name: Tortilla de Maiz

When do you eat it: Morning, noon and night!!!

Prep time: 10 minutes

Cook time: 5 minutes/tortilla

Ingredients:

- 2 tazas Harina de maiz (2 cups corn flour)

- Sal (pinch of salt)

- Bicarbonate de sodio (1/4 tsp. baking soda)

- ½ taza agua (1/2 cup water)

- Aceite (2 tbsp. vegetable oil)

Directions:

1) In a small bowl mix all dry ingredients: corn flour, salt, and baking soda.

2) Slowly add water in water to form a ball of dough. Be careful not to add too much water.

3) Meanwhile, heat oil in frying pan over low heat.

4) Make 3 inch balls of dough (masa). Flatten the balls into a round flat tortilla shape approximately ¼ inch thick (mas o menos). The dough is sticky, so it is recommend that the dough is flattened on the surface of a large plastic zip-lock bag.

5) Put uncooked tortilla onto heated frying pan. The dough should bubble up a little while it’s cooking. Don’t forget to flip and cook both sides evenly until browned.

This is the dirt road I walk down to reach one of my more rural schools...tranquilo!